Pre-Boomer Musings

A relationship with another human being is the greatest gift we can receive.  Yet, it’s so easy to take for granted.  I know because, it took many years before I was willing to look at my faults and work on them.  Only then did I start to experience the joy of just being with another person rather than in control of them.

My revelation may not resonate with those who have never been so self-obsessed to think they were the center of the universe. But if you spent much of your life being self-centered and selfish, you know what I’m talking about.  And if you’re still having difficulties with these issues, don’t give up.  I didn’t start to let go until five years ago, and I’m seventy-two now.  Guess it’s never too late to teach an old dog new tricks, even a pre-boomer like me.

I worked my way up in the business world and became the head of a prominent company.  The road to the top required me to manage people, which I interpreted to mean control them.  Since so much time was spent pursuing my career, my personal life was treated much like an extension of the business.  It was all about me.  I set the goals, developed the game plan, and oversaw its implementation.  There was not a great deal of interaction, and I felt very much alone – but I wouldn’t admit this disturbing fact to anyone.

When I retired in 2004, there was a void in my life.  I had become the business, yet I was no longer part of it.  With time on my hands, thanks to a non-compete and other restrictions, I took a look at the man I had become.  Not pleased with that, I considered the man I would like to be.  It’s been an interesting journey, a trip that was not always easy; but I can look back and see the progress I made in building new relationships and rebuilding old ones.

Becoming aware of my defects, understanding them, letting go of resentments, and taking positive actions have produced results.  I am a happier man, and most people will agree that I’m easier to be around.  And because I usually don’t try to run the show, it’s enjoyable to seat back and let life unfold.  But the real blessing is I appreciate being with family and friends just because they’re there.

What a gift.

Tags: Nostalgia, Retirement // Add Comment »